Arrogance is blinding...but so is a poke to the eye.

Dear readers,

As your eyes peruse the letters that make the words that form the sentences that give birth to the paragraphs that engender meaning to the blog. I want you to close your eyes for just a split second (There you go, don't be scared). Close your eyes and imagine...Imagine that we are all gathered around a warm hearth. The fire is laughing and our hearts are glowing. And now it's time to tickle you with a tale. From my home to yours...

It's list time.

Today I might even give you two. Most likely just one though.

The top reasons that the Y is better than the U.

Having experienced that two I think that I am uniquely qualified. I'm also uniquely good looking.

1. Red is the color of the devil. Blue is the color of the heaven. For those of you who don't believe this just look at the sky. Dangerously following that logic to places where I shouldn't go I also discovered that clouds are the evil that blocks our view of the good and leads us unto temptation. They don't let us see heavenly blue. Next time I'm tempted I will say, "This decision looks overcast" or "Clouds suck."

2. We've all heard the joke, "what do BYU and U of U students have in common? They both applied to BYU!" This insinuates that U students aren't as smart as their southern counterparts. I never really believed this until I was walking to class and I saw a sign on a door. That sign read, "This is a door." It sure was, and I hoped that it cleared up some things for some struggling students.

3. The U has never heard of a Janitor. Thier bathroom cleanliness rivals that of your local Chevron. I should know, I threw up in one of them, and couldn't even tell where the spew had landed. And if the adage is true that "cleanliness is next to godliness," well the U is close to getting an upclose view of outerdarkness. It's no wonder the church sold that place.

4. Utes will brag that all the Prophets have gone there. I will never dispute this. In fact it makes perfect sense. The whole (BYU) have no need of a physician(Mark 2:17). I have the utmost respect for those modern day Samuel the Lamanites that braved the U preaching repentence unto them. In fact, after having viewed and mingled with some of the U students I expect this pattern to continue.

5. I have it on good authority that the U is secretly developing a race of skunk/ape men. They are hairy, stinky and walk w/ a slowness that is scary. Wait that's just the doped up, unshaven, unshowered student that they admit on a regular basis. I can't believe that I swallowed that rumor! Just made sense seeing these students at the time.

Average Ute student just hangin' with his professor.

6. Given the chance any Ute will gladly sacrifice your baby to their god. Their god of course being Vigo the Carpathian from Ghostbusters 2.

Just look, here we go again. Their "god" about to eat another baby!

7. They hired Al Bundy's younger, angrier brother to be their basketball coach...And not Al Bundy himself! Guess which one has scored 5 touchdowns in one game? Also guess what they both have in common? Neither one has beat the Cougars!

8. They hate puppies.

That is it for now. A little shocking I know. But that's just the way it is.